FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR

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FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR & JOKES

FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR & JOKES: a 55-year plus collection.

Compiled by Daniel Worona "Rara Avis"  (a.k.a. DaWor).

Welcome to the fattest collection of FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR SAYINGS and JOKES in the world.

WARNING: Do not try to devour my entire FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR Web site in one sitting. The Surgeon General has determined that it can cause FUNSTROKE.



1. YOU CAN EAT OFF MY KITCHEN FLOOR
(There are crumbs everywhere.)

2. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU CALL ME AS LONG AS YOU CALL ME TO DINNER.

3. Can you say CHEESE without a smile?

4. HE'S SO COUNTRY HE THINKS A SEVEN COURSE MEAL IS A POSSUM AND A SIX-PACK.

5. The potato salad was SPUDDERLY DELICIOUS.

6. IT'S LONELY AT THE TOP BUT YOU EAT BETTER.

7. Kitchen sign: I LOVE TO COOK. I LOVE TO CLEAN HOUSE. I LOVE MY NEW MEDICATION.

8. T-shirt: I HAVE A DEGREE IN LIBERAL ARTS.
DO YOU WANT FRIES WITH THAT?

9. T-shirt: WORLD'S GREATEST LOVER (of pizza).

10. TO A MAN WITH AN EMPTY STOMACH, FOOD IS HIS GOD. --GANDHI

Hungry for more FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR? Please visit the rest of this website.



 


NUMBER ONE DIET HUMOR WEBSITE IN THE WORLD: 

My #1 DIET HUMOR site: My more than 333,333.33 plus DIET HUMOR SAYINGS and DIET JOKES: a 55-year plus collection compiled by Daniel Worona is world famous (It is #1 on all the major HONEST search engines). Just click on any active DIET HUMOR SAYINGS and DIET JOKES link found throughout this site or a link can be found on my FAVORITE LINKS PAGE.
 
NOTE: This is a hobby site that I hope to publish so everyone can enjoy it.  Ninety-nine point five precent (99.5%) of my humor collection is not of the internet.

Please go to my FAVORITE LINKS PAGE and click on the DIET HUMOR link.

This has been the #1 DIET HUMOR Web site in the world for nearly twenty (20) years.






I will add FOOD HUMOR and DRINK HUMOR from time to time, please return often.




FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR and FOOD JOKES:

1. THOSE WHO FORGET THE PASTA ARE CONDEMNED TO REHEAT IT.

2. WE JUST CELEBRATED OUR TIN ANNIVERSARY
--FIFTEEN YEARS OF EATING OUT OF CANS.

3. NOWADAYS, THERE ARE FOUR BASIC FOOD GROUPS: CANNED, FROZEN, FAST-FOOD AND INSTANT.
(Some people add a fifth group: CHOCOLATE.)

4. HORS D'OEUVRE: A HAM SANDWICH CUT INTO TWENTY PIECES.

5. CASSEROLE RECIPE: COMBINE ALL THE LEFTOVERS IN THE FRIDGE. SPRINKLE POTATO CHIPS AND CHEESE ON TOP. BAKE.

6. THE MOST NOBLE OF ALL DOGS IS THE HOT DOG, BECAUSE IT FEEDS THE HAND THAT BITES IT.

7. THE HOT DOG HAS ALL FOUR FOOD GROUPS: MUSTARD, RELISH, BUN AND MEAT.

8. HUNGER IS THE BEST SAUCE IN THE WORLD.

9. FOOD JOKE:
CUSTOMER: WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS FISH?
WAITER: LONG TIME, NO SEA.

10. PEANUT BUTTER: A BREAD SPREAD.



WORD OF MOUTH: I do not have a friend in the world to help me get published, EXCEPT YOU. You can help me get some media attention and get published sooner by e-mailing the following E-MAIL DIET to all your friends.

ONE-LINER FOOD HUMOR:

The snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called "The Fission Chips."


On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack.


The four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant, and Chocolate.


 A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.


 Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you.


 Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."


 I thought you were trying to get into shape?

FATTIE SAYS: I am. The shape I've selected is a triangle.



DANIEL WORONA'S FAMOUS FOOD AND DRINK E-MAIL DIET:


Please COPY AND PASTE the following e-mail and pass it on to all your friends.

 
Dear Friend,
 

Daniel Worona's amazing, fast-acting, super-duper, polyunsaturated FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR E-MAIL DIET:

 


Read half of my FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR Web site (
http://foodanddrinkhumor.freeservers.com), and you will laugh off *5 pounds.

 

If you take time to enjoy the entire FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR DIET  Web site, you will laugh off *10 pounds. Send this message to all your friends and you will lose *5 pounds. If you delete this message, you will instantly gain 10 pounds. 

*RESULTS MAY VARY ACCORDING TO YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR. 

Thank you,  

Daniel L. Worona "Rara Avis"

 


Please click on this ACTIVE LINK now to see my FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR Web site:
http://foodanddrinkhumor.freeservers.com 
 


Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.

(Please include the words FOOD HUMOR or DIRINK HUMOR or DIET HUMOR in the Subject line of your e-mail, othwise it will be deleted and unread.)

 



 

 

 

 


FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR

This FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR collection has been collected over the past 55 years plus. Many of these food jokes and drink jokes have never been published.

PLEASE E-MAIL ME IF YOU ARE INTERESTED.

Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.



Don't forget to check out DANIEL WORONA'S more than 333,333.33 DIET HUMOR / HUMOUR SAYINGS and DIET JOKES by clicking on this "HOT" (active) link: 

http://danworona.50megs.com

(A third of a million = three hundred thirty-three thousand three hundred thirty-three and thirty-three hundredths.)

Have you ever heard a third of a joke? You are in for a treat! Read on.


Please check out the rest of my FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR Web site for more tasty morsels.



COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER: If any of these sayings or images are in breach of copyright, I will willingly remove them and/or give proper credit. (Credits may be found on the various pages and Favorite Links Page.)

FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR Web site by Daniel Worona. "Rara Avis." ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.

(Please include the words FOOD HUMOR in the Subject line of your e-mail.)

PUBLISHERS: Please e-mail me if you are interested in publishing any of my one-of-a-kind humor collections. Much of the material has never been published and/or is original material by yours truly. Please see my FAVORITE LINKS PAGE for a special link called FOR PUBLISHERS ONLY.

NOTE: If you e-mail me and do not receive a reply within fifteen days, please e-mail me again. I delete a lot of spam and junk e-mails, and I may have accidently deleted your e-mail.



1. WHEN I'VE HAD IT WITH COOKING AND CAN'T FACE MOPPING, SOME DO THE WORK, BUT I GO SHOPPING.

2. THE BEST WAY TO SERVE LEFTOVERS IS TO SOMEONE ELSE.

3. MANKIND IS DIVIDED INTO TWO CLASSES: THOSE WHO ARE LOOKING FOR FOOD AND THOSE WHO ARE LOOKING FOR APPETITE.

4. Waiter: "How do you like your steak sir?"
 Customer: "Big."

5. Never serve meals on time. The starving eat everything.


DID YOU KNOW THAT NINETY-NINE POINT FIVE PERCENT (99.5%) OF MY FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR AND MY DIET HUMOR COLLECTION IS NOT FOUND ON THE INTERNET!!!  I HAVE A "GOLDMINE" OF DIET HUMOR AND DIET JOKES, HOWEVER, THIS COLLECTION WILL REMAIN "BURIED" UNTIL IT IS PROPERLY PUBLISHED IN BOOK FORM.

CAN YOU HELP ME FIND A PUBLISHER OR OFFER A SUGGESTION. IF SO, PLEASE E-MAIL ME.A BIG THANKY, Daniel Worona 

Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.



Pizza image credit: departments.weber.edu


Please visit the rest of my FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR website. You will EAT IT UP!



COPYRIGHT by DANIEL L. WORONA "Rara Avis" / "Rare Bird" (a.k.a. DaWor).
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.



Don't forget to visit my world-famous DIET HUMOR and CHOCOLATE HUMOR Web site: www.danworona.50megs.com

This has been the #1 DIET HUMOR Web site in the world for nearly twenty (20) years.

 His collection contains more than 333,333.33 DIET HUMOR SAYING & DIET JOKES.

(A third of a million = three hundred thirty-three thousand three hundred thirty-three and thirty-three hundredths.)

Have you ever heard a third of a joke? You are in for a treat! Read on.



 


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