BARBECUE (BBQ) HUMOR

FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR & JOKES: a 65-year plus collection. Compiled by Daniel Worona "Rara Avis." BARBEQUE HUMOR and BBQ HUMOR + BARBEQUE JOKES and BBQ JOKES = GRATE HUMOR (BARBEQUE or BARBECUE: anyway you spell it is GRATE!)

I'd be happy to receive any comments, BARBECUE HUMOR SAYINGS, BARBECUE JOKES, BARBECUE RIDDLES, or BARBECUE PUNS.

HOT OFF THE GRILL:

1. T-shirt: DAD AT BBQ (Keep back 200 feet)

2. T-shirt: WORLD'S GREATEST LOVER (of BBQ)

3. BBQ apron: USDA PRIME, TENDER, SUCCULENT AND NATURALLY AGED (and the BBQ's not bad either.)

4. The key to good barbecuing is having a sauce that can cover up your mistakes.

5. My grilled fish is so bad that my cat only has three lives left.

6. They say the great BBQ chefs put a lot of feeling into their cooking. I put a lot of Tobasco in mine.

THE FUN HAS JUST BEGUN!!!

1 BARBECUE JOKE:

Is it proper to eat BBQ ribs with your fingers?

No, fingers should be eaten separately!

Barbeque may not be the answer to all our problems, but it’s a good start.

4 BARBEQUE SLOGANS:

Time to barbeque low and slow.

BBQ Heat and meat is what no other food can beat.

Put your pork on your fork.

Chilling and grilling.

1 FUNNY BARBECUER T-SHIRT:

Certified BBQ-ologist.

FUNNY BARBEQUE QUOTE:

“Love is in the air. No wait, that’s BBQ. Never mind.”

BARBECUE T-SHIRT SLOGAN:

BOSS OF THE SAUCE.

HOT BBQ APRON SAYING:

If I am on fire, this is not a training exercise.
(Please extinguish.)

BBQ JOKE:

I was flipping through the new Victoria's Secret catalogue and now I have a craving for ribs.

BARBECUE HUMOR:

Q: What spoiled the Labor Day barbecue?

A. When the mosquitoes next door dropped by for a bite.

BBQ JOKE:

CHIT CHATING ABOUT FOOD AND BBQing:

“Mmmmm. This all reminds me of Ol' Joe. His motto was, “Low and slow.”

“He was seriously into barbecue, huh?”

“No, unfortunately, he was a pilot.”

THAT REMINDS ME ABOUT AN OLD PILOT TRUISM:

A PLANE CRASH CAN RUIN YOUR WHOLE DAY.

Q: Why did the skeleton go to the barbecue?

A: To get another rib.

BARBECUE ZINGER:

Q. Do old smokin' barbeque pit masters ever die?

A. No, but they do get burned out.

BBQ SLOGAN:

Chillin’ n Grillin’.

BBQ PUN:

A guy wanted to take home the leftovers from the chef's big BBQ feast, but somebody else foiled his plans.

BARBEQUE RIDDLE:

Q. Why did the blonde throw her doll on the grill?

A. She heard it was a Barbie-que.

BBQing IS A GRATE PLEASURE. D.L.WORONA

66+ BARBEQUE JOKES, QUOTES, ONE-LINERS AND PUNS:

BARBECUE " RIB TICKLERS" by DANIEL WORONA

1.THE SIGHT OF BBQ RIBS IS EYE-ROTIC.

2. BBQ apron: I AM A GRATE COOK.

3. BEING A BBQ CHEF IS A GRATE JOB.

4. BARBECUING IS A GRATE SKILL.

BARBECUE APRONS:

1. KISS THE COOK.

2. RELISH TODAY. KETCHUP TOMORROW.

3. SAME CIRCUS... DIFFERENT CLOWNS.

4. MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE.

5. MY WIFE IS THE QUEEN OF EVERYTHING; I'M THE KING OF WHAT'S LEFT.

6. MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY.

7. BLESSED ARE THE FLEXIBLE, FOR THEY SHALL NEVER BE BENT OUT OF SHAPE.

8. WHATEVER MELTS YOUR BUTTER.

9. HOGAPALOOZA COOKOUT.

10. HOCUS SMOKUS.

15+ BBQ QUOTES AND JOKES:

Q: Why don’t Italians have BBQs?

A: The spaghetti falls through the grill.

Q: Why did the skeleton go to a BBQ?

A: For the spare ribs.

Q: Why can't Mexicans have a barbeque?

A: The beans keep falling through the grill.

Q: Why can't Chinese barbecue?

A: Because the rice falls through the grill.

Q: What did the exasperated man serve at his barbecue?

A: Sheesh kabobs.

Q: What’s the difference between a dad and a grill?

A: A grill runs out of gas.

Q: Why was the BBQ chef at the cookout so happy?

A: He met the grill of his dreams.

FUNNY BBQ QUOTE:

Barbecue may not be the road to world peace, but it's a start.

BARBECUE WHAMMY:

"Would I like to have a barbecue? Duh."

BBQ SIGN:

Q: What do you call a line of Barbies?

A: A Barbecue!

Q: What do you call a big ape that likes to barbecue?

A: A g’rilla!

BBQ LOVERS AND THEIR FRIENDS QUOTE:

“No one has friends over to microwave!”

FUNNY BARBEQUE HUMOR BUTTON:

MY BBQ IS SMOKIN’!

The man who invented the hamburger was smart; the man who invented the cheeseburger was a genius!

MORE BBQ APRONS, BBQ PUNS AND BARBECUE SLOGANS:

CHILLIN’ N GRILLIN’.
GET SAUCED WITHOUT THE HANG OVER.
GRILLS GONE WILD.
MEAT ME IN PARADISE.
PUT SOME SOUTH IN YO’ MOUTH.
IF YOU’RE LOOKING, YOU AIN’T COOKIN’.
NATURAL BORN GRILLER.
NEVER TRUST A SKINNY CHEF.
EATING IS A NECESSITY, BUT BBQ IS AN ART.
RELISH TODAY. KETCHUP TOMORROW.
THE SAUCE IS THE BOSS.
YES, A STEAK CAN BE SMOKED!
WHO SAYS SMOKING IS BAD?
BURNT IS JUST ANOTHER FLAVOR.

PUNS, PHRASES AND CAPTIONS FOR BARBEQUE PICTURES:

Natural born griller.

Certified BBQ-ologist.

Dear, burgers. You’re so barbe-cute.

My comfort food is barbeque.

"It ain't easy being cheesy."

That ain’t burnt, that’s flavor.

You don’t like hot dogs? Well, you’re the wurst.

Moaning while eating good barbecue is considered a compliment.

Many ThanQues for visiting my barbeque page.

Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.

Don't forget to visit my world famous DIET HUMOR SAYINGS and DIET JOKES: a 65-year plus collection compiled by DANIEL WORONA "Rara Avis." It is #1 DIET HUMOR Web site on GOOGLE, YAHOO, AOL, and all of the major (HONEST) search engines. http://www.danworona.50megs.com

This has been the #1 DIET HUMOR Web site in the world for a quarter-century.

COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER: If any of the BARBEQUE HUMOR SAYINGS, BARBEQUE JOKES, or BBQ images are in violation of copyright, I will willingly remove them and/or give due credit.

IMAGE CREDITS:
1. BBQ 1 image: rnw.nl/en/html
2. BBQ 2 image: ahlln.be/vademecum

DID YOU KNOW THAT NINETY-NINE POINT FIVE PERCENT (99.5%) OF MY FOOD AND DRINK HUMOR AND MY DIET HUMOR COLLECTION IS NOT FOUND ON THE INTERNET!!! I HAVE A "GOLDMINE" OF DIET HUMOR AND DIET JOKES, HOWEVER, THIS COLLECTION WILL REMAIN "BURIED" UNTIL IT IS PROPERLY PUBLISHED IN BOOK FORM.

CAN YOU HELP ME FIND A PUBLISHER OR OFFER A SUGGESTION. IF SO, PLEASE E-MAIL ME. A BIG THANKY, Daniel Worona

He has "searched the world" for more than 65-years for diet humor / humour, diet ditties, diet limericks, weight-loss humor, fat humour and diet slang. Daniel Worona has thousand's of original and unpublished diet humor sayings, diet cartoons, and diet word plays.

NO ONE CAN EVEN COME CLOSE TO DULICATING THIS NONESUCH DIET HUMOR COLLECTION.

This is the FATTEST and best diet humor / humour collection in the world!!!

Please visist my DIET HUMOR AND CHOCOLATE HUMOR website: (The number one DIET HUMOR & DIET JOKES website in the world): www.danworona.50megs.com

This has been the #1 DIET HUMOR Web site in the world for a quarter-century.

WORST CASE SCENARIO:

If for some reason my lifelong collection of more than umpteen thousand DIET HUMOR & DIET JOKES is never published, it will probably end up in a trash can.

Who loses? Not me! YOU DO!!! BIG-TIME!!!

Why? Because I have had a ton of fun and a ton of laughs collecting it.

SEEKING LITERARY AGENT AND PUBLISHER: Please e-mail me if you can help.

MY E-MAIL ADDRESS:

Yes, I will read your e-mail and diet jokes if you include the words DIET HUMOR in the Subject line of your e-mail, otherwise it will be deleted and unread.

Please use your regular e-mail service to e-mail me at: dworona@yahoo.com.

BBQing IS A GRATE SKILL --D.L.W.